FOOTBALL AND CHRISTIANITY
We love football. Well, some of us do. The following is a humorous look at some similarities between football and the church. I hope it will make you smile and chuckle, and maybe say, “Hmmm”. Paul used sarcasm (1 Cor. 4:8-14) and athletic analogies (1 Cor. 9:24-27; Heb. 12:1-2) in his writings. (Disclaimer: I did not write the following, but I laughed at them even though they do hit close to home.)
Benchwarmer - Those who do not sing, pray, work, or apparently do anything but sit.
Quarterback Sneak - Church members quietly leaving during the invitation.
Draw Play - What many children do with the bulletin during worship.
Halftime - The period between Bible Classes and worship.
Backfield-in-motion - Making a trip to the back (restroom or water fountain) repeatedly during the service.
Staying in the Pocket - What happens to a lot of money that should be given to the Lord’s work.
Instant Replay - The preacher loses his notes and falls back on last week’s illustrations.
Trap - You’re called on to pray and you’re asleep.
End Run - Getting out of church quickly, without speaking to any guest or fellow member.
Flex Defense - The ability to allow absolutely nothing said during the sermon to affect your life.
Blitz - The rush for restaurants following the closing prayer.
Two-minute Warning - The point at which you realize the sermon is almost over and begin to gather up you children and belongings, pulling the song book out of the rack, etc.
Half-back Option - The decision of several of the congregation not to return for the evening service.
Sudden Death - What happens to the attention span of the congregation if the preacher goes “overtime”.
A merry heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones (Prov. 17:22).